A woman wants to experience an orgasm - but it just doesn't work when having sex with her partner. The Gender Orgasm Gap describes this phenomenon. Here's what you can do as a woman to close that gap and reach orgasm during sex.
What is the Gender Orgasm Gap?
The orgasm gap is based on the gender pay gap and describes the discrepancy in the frequency of orgasms during sex between men and women. One study says that 95 percent of straight men almost always orgasm during sex. However, only 65 percent of straight women typically have an orgasm during shared sex.
The relationship is more balanced among homosexual couples: According to the survey, 89 percent of gay men and 86 percent of lesbian women get their money's worth when it comes to sex. Among bisexuals, it is 88 percent of men and 66 percent of women.
Why is it that women don't reach orgasm?
What is the difference that more homosexual than straight women orgasm regularly during sex?
One assumption is that homosexual women know the female body very well and can empathize better with how it feels to be touched. However, everyone has their own way of getting excited. This means that during sex you need to pay attention to the other person and be curious about the other person. Good communication is also a clear advantage in the order of being able to talk about individual wishes and needs regarding sexuality.
What do women need to orgasm during sex?
The study has uncovered the secret of women who regularly orgasm. These orgasmic women have three things in common that are crucial during sexuality: They also experience manual stimulation. They kiss their partner intensely during sex. They have oral sex.
There is not only an orgasm gap, but also an oral sex gap. A Canadian study found that there is more blowing than licking. 63% of men have had oral sex during their last sex, compared to 44% of women. Many women would need oral stimulation to have an orgasm, but it's rarely done.
You can do this to achieve orgasm during sex
In order to stand up for your own desire and satisfaction, you often need knowledge and curiosity about your own female body. Knowing your body and its sensations is fundamental to the path to orgasm.
Explore your lust
Many people have a particular way of bringing themselves to orgasm during solo sex . This is usually already automated and many do not even know exactly what they are doing. As you arouse yourself and keep getting aroused, pay attention to exactly what you're doing. How is the tension in your body? how do you move your fingers With what pressure and at what speed do you stimulate yourself? How does your body move in general? If you know exactly how to arouse yourself, you can use this knowledge and integrate it into your partner's sexuality.
Pamper your body
Pampering your own body with a bath, stroking yourself, and paying attention to what is good for you is a blessing for the soul and the body. Exploring and rediscovering your vulva and vagina, again and again, is helpful to get to know and discover yourself and your own sexuality better. The Date Box Pussy Meditation, for example, will help you with this.
Always take the time to touch your body, vulva, and vagina carefully and lovingly. In this way, you strengthen your connection to your body, learn a better body feeling and pay more attention to yourself. If you feel good about yourself in your body, this is an important building block on your way to orgasm.
Why does it work alone but not with a partner?
If you can manage to have an orgasm on your own, congratulations! Orgasms are great! If things don't work out with your partner, this can have various causes.
Vaginal stimulation is not enough
Many women need extra stimulation during intercourse to achieve orgasm. The clitoris is there for many women, the holy grail. The point where the rockets fire. The violin in the orchestra.
Adding extra stimulation to yourself during intercourse or seducing your partner to rub your clitoris the way you like it can help you achieve orgasm. You can also show your counterpart how you would like to be touched. You can take his*her hand and guide it or you stimulate yourself in front of him*her. You can show by moaning or speaking out where it feels good for you and she should continue. Even if it takes effort, it will be worth it for you. Because your partner will also be happy if he or she knows how you would like it.
If you're having trouble reaching orgasm during intercourse despite clitoral stimulation, it may be because your body isn't used to experiencing an orgasm with something inserted in the vagina. This can result from focusing primarily on the clitoris and leaving your vagina untouched during solo sex. To train the body to continue building arousal during intercourse, you can practice solo sex. You can also use a glass dildo and stimulate yourself in the vagina. This will gradually teach you how to experience an orgasm during intercourse.
You can't turn off your head
If thoughts keep running through your head and you find it difficult to engage in sexuality, try to focus on your body and your feelings again and again. It is important that you create a sex-positive context for your sexuality. That means putting away things like a full laundry basket that might distract you from your thoughts. You can also create a pleasant atmosphere with candlelight or a good scent.
If you know the problem of not being able to switch off in everyday life, you can always take short breaks and concentrate on your breathing for a few minutes. In addition, you can do short meditations or do a body scan. If you learn to let your thoughts become quieter in everyday life, you will also do better in sexuality.
You don't want to lose control
When we have an orgasm, we often can't control how we look, the sounds we make, or the faces we make. The moment of orgasm is a moment when we are fully in the here and now and immersed in the feeling of orgasm. If you're scared of how you're going to act during orgasm, you can practice this during solo sex as well. It's best if you exaggerate. Whether you're actually having an orgasm or not, moan, grimace, and move intensely. Fake it until you make it - you will gradually lose your inhibitions and also dare to show yourself to your partner.
How you get an orgasm is not compatible with twosome sex
If you have a very specific way of getting excited and having an orgasm and you can't implement this in your partner's sexuality, you often don't have an orgasm. For example, if a woman can only orgasm with her legs pressed together, opening her legs will greatly reduce her arousal. If the woman desires an orgasm during intercourse, she is allowed to expand the way in which she orgasms. For example, she can pack more variations into the solo sex and keep trying to open her legs and keep the excitement. This takes practice, which will pay off.
In any case, you can bring yourself to orgasm in the presence of your partner. Such moments encourage intimacy between a couple and may give you new ideas about how to shape your sexuality together.
Dare to stand up for your desire
Society often creates an image of sexuality as quickly and purposefully heading towards orgasm. For many women, sex is over too quickly to really engage in it. Everyone is different when it comes to how long it takes for someone to really get in the mood for sex. For many women, it takes up to 20 minutes to be able to absorb sexuality in the here and now.
If you want longer sex, dare to tell your partner. Sex doesn't have to be over when he's had an orgasm, either. Sexuality offers many forms of play, the penis in the vagina is one of them, and there are countless more. If you want longer foreplay, use oral sex or a vibrator, and let your partner know. Saying clearly and showing what a woman wants sometimes requires a dose of courage and clarity. But this is the only way you can live your authentic sexuality during sex. If you dare to stand up for yourself, your lust, and your arousal, the more pleasurable your sex life will be.
As a couple, you can find a way for both of you to have an orgasmic celebration of your partner's sexuality. That's why to tell your partner what you want and how and dare to stand up for your lust and excitement.
Would you like to show your partner how to spoil yourself during solo sex? Then the Masturbation Date Box is perfect for you. 
Source:
https://www.welt.de/kmpkt/article162411792/Drei-Tipps-wie-Frauen-haeufiger-zum-Orgasmus-kommen.html
Studie Orgasm Gap/ Oral Sex Gap:
https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-017-0939-z
https://www.utpjournals.press/doi/10.3138/cjhs.251-A2
