The art of seduction.... Seducing your partner is a unique opportunity to get him going and at the same time give yourself pleasurable moments. But you can also go way too far when you're just starting to seduce your partner. The key to seduction is balance. Lead him to the top and keep him there. Don't let it get to the point where it gets frustrating for either of you or even upset anyone.
Seduce your partner in 24 ways...
Feel free to adapt these tips to suit your preferences and personality. Think of them as inspiration to seduce your partner and don't treat them as rigid rules.
1. Send him naughty messages
Your cell phone is an easy way to seduce him - and there are many techniques you can try to seduce him. You can send him a cheeky message when you're at the grocery store or when he's at work.
Your messages could be more innocent and alluding to what you're thinking about, or they could be more explicit.
You could also send a photo or video to turn him on. It will drive him crazy that he's not around you, but he'll make love to you when he finally walks through the door after work. Just make sure someone else doesn't see the messages when you seduce your partner with your text messages.
If you want to give your partner ecstatic orgasms that will make him crazy about you, you'll find the tips in our exclusive and discreet newsletter. You'll also learn the 5 dangerous misconceptions that keep many from having free sex and how to avoid them. Get the tips here.
2. Touch yourself - but don't let him touch you
Once you master this tip, you'll know how to skillfully seduce and tease your partner. It works great as foreplay when you're already undressed. It can also be part of domination games when you tie him up so he can't physically touch you.
The sight of you touching yourself and the knowledge that they can't do the same — and not even touch himself — is one of the most effective ways to seduce your partner. Impress him by reminding him that he can't touch you. You can say things like: "Don't you wish you could do more than look?"
Of course you should "give in" and let him touch you after a while... if he was a good boy!
3. Seduce him on the phone (to the point of phone sex)
If you're not in the same place as your partner, you can still do some naughty seduction. All you need is a phone! When you're on the phone, you can tell your partner how much you miss them and that you want them to be there. You could allude to what you do when you think about him or even what you're doing right now. Knowing that he can't be there to see and touch you will surely annoy him. However - the seduction could end quickly if it leads to hot phone sex.
Phone sex is a great way to stay sexually intimate with your partner, even if you're in a long-distance relationship. Even if you don't undress on the other end of the line, a little moaning and heavy breathing can get his blood pumping harder. It's also a good way to scout out the location for real phone sex.
And when you're ready to pull out all the stops and seduce him on the phone, you can take out your favorite toy or just use your hand and let your partner know what you're doing. Describe as clearly as you like when describing what you're doing...or what you want to do or something you've done.
Take turns telling each other a story and let the fact that he hears you turn you on and cum even more intensely.
4. Accidentally "flashing" something
If you live with your partner, you have many opportunities to seduce him. This also applies to dressing and undressing: this is often done hastily, especially if you are running late. But slow it down, or at least make it so he can see some of your skin.
Exaggerate your movements, run your hand down your thigh while adjusting your skirt or stockings, and do anything else that gets his attention. You don't even have to make eye contact; although it could certainly increase the sexual tension of the moment.
But it can still be just as strong if you pretend you didn't "notice" what he saw because then he feels like he got a little sneak peek.
5. Play with your words
Brush up on your pun skills, as clearly ambiguous puns and euphemisms are a guaranteed surefire way to seduce your partner. If you can slip something lewd into your conversation in a less obvious way, all the better.
You don't have to be a poet to seduce with words. However, you can certainly spot the hot sizzling as the two of you exchange hilarious, steamy banter.
6. Games with ice cream
Involve all your senses in your art of seduction - for example by playing with the temperatures. Just take an ice cube with you at the next foreplay! When you rub frozen ice across your skin to let the ice melt into rivulets and run down your skin, you're seducing him in the right way. It may feel chilly, but it's definitely getting hot.
Let the ice run down your jaw, neck and between your breasts. You can also run it along your panty line or in your panties if you're seducing him before sex.
Put it in your mouth to complete the game. If your mouth is still cool, take his cock in your mouth for a blowjob he won't soon forget!
7. Hug him
This is kind of the opposite of the previous way of seducing your partner. Instead of saying, "Hands off!", you can surprise him by hugging him in a public place.
Maybe you pass him in a crowded room or hallway. Or you could bend down to reach something in the store. Let your hand, your breasts or your butt touch him very lightly for a moment. No one else will notice if you tease his penis, but he definitely will!
8. Draw attention to your mouth with a lollipop
Now it's getting really cliche. But we all know the movies where a woman sucks on a lollipop, eats a banana, or just drinks from a straw. It seems to drive men insane. Your partner won't be able to stop thinking about what you could do with your mouth... Don't like the lollipop idea? That's okay. We have many other tempting ideas.
Your mouth is definitely one of the sexiest parts of your body. You can also draw attention to your mouth by biting your lip, which most men love, or circling your lips with your tongue, for example. You can even trace your lip with your finger or other object if you like.
There's something about footing that resonates in all of us. Maybe it's because feet can be so sensitive and erotic, but you can still seduce him without being overly sexual. If you like that, you might have a foot fetish.
Footies is a simple game. Rub your shoe on the side of his foot. If you're sitting together at a desk or table, drop your shoe and brush your foot against the pant legs. You can also rub your foot under his pant leg along his shin.
You can also try foot footing with different shoes and stockings. Socks feel different than nylons or bare feet.
If you're really daring, you can lift your leg and massage his cock from outside his pants. He'll love this if he's into footjobs.
10. Tickle him
Tickling is an enticing combination of physical proximity through the laying on of your hands, and being in control and evoking reactions he cannot control. Not everyone likes being tickled, so consider what you know about your partner before teasing them in this way. If he's okay with that, continue to physically seduce him.
Extra tip: You can also use a feather to tickle your partner with very gentle touches.
11. Make out with him when he least expects it
If you always let your partner take the lead, you can change things and seduce them by initiating things. Start making out with him unexpectedly.
Wait until he does something he doesn't mind being interrupted, e.g. watching TV before approaching him. For example, you can start with slow kisses, wrap your arms around him, and gently stroke him.
The ultimate form of sensually seducing your partner is the striptease. It even has "tease" in its name! The art of striptease is all about being seductive and being in touch with your body. You will slowly undress and move in a way that will remind your partner of what you are capable of.
13. Kiss him not
The next time you want to seduce your partner, approach them with a kiss. Then stop. You can either put a finger between your lips or just press your lips lightly against his without actually kissing him. Extra-Ideas: Make a soft, satisfied noise, almost like a moan, if you really want to tease him physically!
14. Shower together
One of the loveliest things about a couple's shower is how hot things can get, both figuratively and literally. In fact, showering for two is not only nice to lather each other up and enjoy the warm splash of water together, but also a great way to seduce your partner: when he sees your body, you lather each other's hair or you lather his push your hands away from your body very gently. You can find more inspiration for a hot shower in our Oral Total Box!
15. Play a game of strip poker
There's something funny about the classic strip poker game because you're not actually playing it to win. Instead, you play for a chance to show off your body and see some of his. Don't worry if you're not a poker fan. There are many games that you can easily turn into a foreplay session.
16. Make him want more
One of the easiest ways to seduce someone is to make them want more. Specifically, this could mean making out but then leaving (or asking him to) before anything else can happen.
17. Dress seductively
There are many ways to seduce with your clothes and you don't have to be a certain body type to achieve this! All you have to do is:
- Emphasize the body parts that you know he likes. If you are not sure, breasts and butt are a good start. But some people love bellies, thighs or other body parts!
- Let a little peek out. Maybe it's a bra strap or some hot lingerie.
- leave something out. Men often go crazy when they realize that their partners aren't wearing underwear. So whisper this tempting treat in his ear when you're in a public place and watch how he reacts! Consider flashing something discreetly so he can see what you've skipped.
- Wear whatever makes you strong and hot, even if it's unconventional. This will show in your behavior!
18. Use your body to tease him
If you are actually in the same place with your partner, you have many opportunities to seduce him in bed. Even before you undress, you can breathe on his skin. Opening your mouth wide warms your breath while pursing your lips cools it. Try this on his chest, neck, or ear, these are all erogenous zones- while you whisper into it.
If you're undressed but before sex, try rubbing your vulva against his penis. Chances are that this feels pretty good to you. You can even cum if you get the right clitoral stimulation!
Finally, if he tries to penetrate you, pull away or push his body away from yours. You could take this time to return to kissing or other activities, or just to examine his body.
19. Keep your hand on him
It's a well-known fact that women often touch men's arms when they're into a guy. But that touch can be used to seduce a partner long after you've moved beyond flirting. For example, you could gently (or not so gently) slap your partner's butt, if he is "naughty". By the way, you can find more tips about spanking in our Spanking Date Guide!
Alternatively, consider brushing or hugging his butt when you walk past each other. If you're a fan of a certain part of his body, a touch in passing can be a real eye-catcher!
A sensual massage is a great way to relax and get in the mood for sex while bonding with your partner. Of course, that doesn't have to lead to anything. But if you want to seduce him, you can give him a sensual massage, getting close to his penis... but never too close. You can also take a look at his penis if he's able to see it and let him know where your mind is even if your hands haven't made it there yet. Don't be surprised if he takes control of your hands or even pulls you towards him. More information about a sensual penis massage can be found in our Tantra Date Box!
21. Use your eyes
While many of our tips for seducing your partner are about how you touch them - or not - you don't have to touch your partner to seduce them. Instead, you can just use your eyes. Make prolonged eye contact to let him know you're interested. You can give him a passionate look, smile at him or even raise your eyebrows - whatever message you want to send!
Bonus: After you've got his attention, you can direct his eye contact by running your finger from your neck to your collarbone or drawing attention to your mouth. Of course, he could break eye contact in the process, but it's worth it when it comes to the art of seduction.
22. Include your voice
Do you know how sexy it is when your partner lowers their voice a little in bed, even if they're just tired? If you don't have a sexy voice of your own (or think you don't) it's time to find one. You can experiment with lowering the pitch of your own voice or just speaking in hushed tones. If you use this voice in the bedroom, you may even be able to rev him up outside the bedroom using this voice (this is also known as conditioning).
23. Seduce him, literally
A good way to seduce your partner in an erotic way is to do it verbally. Being teasing and cheeky is showing him that you're interested but that he doesn't have all the power, and on top of that, it's showing him that you're fun and confident. Seducing is all about playfully joking, but not insulting him.
24. Keep it light
One way to seduce your partner is to stimulate him but keep it so light that he can't orgasm. A feathery touch while caressing your partner or giving them a blowjob is a great way to accomplish this. Instead of being quick or rough, be gentle. Pet him instead. When he gets to the point where he desperately needs more, you know you've done a good job seducing him! This technique is also called Edging - to come almost to the climax and then withdraw again. Would you like to try it yourself? There are tips & tricks in our Edging Date Box.
Keep this in mind when seducing your partner
Although the following important concepts for seducing your partner are pretty obvious by now, they're worth repeating. Follow these guidelines to avoid sexual frustration:
- Seduction should be fun. The films often portray seduction as something that looks incredibly serious and over the top. But it doesn't usually happen that way. Remember to have fun, laugh and smile, and don't obsess over what seductions should look or sound like. Have fun and enjoy!
- Seduction, like any interaction, can be a bit awkward. That's okay. Laugh at yourself and with your partner.
- Seducing is fun, but don't overdo it. If you just seduce all the time, your partner might get bored or upset. Because of this, being known as an erotic seductress is sometimes bad. This brings us to our next point.
- Seduction is two steps forward and one step back. You get a little closer, then you pull away or... You pull away before you get a little closer.
- Seducing erotically means leaving him in the dark. If he doesn't know what to expect, things get more exciting. Don't assume that he'll never want to be seduced again just because you've just tried so hard!
- Use things that help you seduce. If you can't see each other because of work, school, or other commitments, make it a fun seduction. You can even incorporate these little hindrances into your dirty talk by saying something like, "I'd love to bang you if I just didn't have to work now."
- It's not always the right time to seduce. Sometimes other concerns take precedence, be it responsibilities or even a stomach ache. And just because that one time seduction didn't get the reaction you wanted, doesn't mean you shouldn't keep trying!
With this general advice and some of the specific tips for seducing your partner above, you have a lot to try when it comes to seducing your partner. Knowing how much you can turn him on and make him want you is a great way to feel confident and sexy. So keep practicing until you find the right balance. Remember, seduction should be fun for you too and can lead to amazing sex, which is why erotic seduction works so well as foreplay when you want to be a little naughty!
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