Sex during the period: no-go or pleasure booster?

Even in our modern, enlightened society, the topic of "periods and sex" is unfortunately still a taboo subject. Why is that? Surely it is because there are many prejudices surrounding this topic. In addition, shame plays an important role, because many people with vulvas are convinced that this special time in each month is quasi invisible and hidden and must be overcome or endured.

Menstruation is an important, natural process

Part of sexual liberation is about freeing ourselves from the fear of being "gross" or "unclean." Menstruation is a natural process that is important. The still widespread uncertainty surrounding this topic is groundless and must be dismantled. Also, there is far less blood flowing than most of us realize. Of course, it's still a bloody affair. On average, about 60 milliliters of blood are lost during an entire period. An open approach to the topic of periods, menstruation and blood in the partnership is an essential prerequisite if we want to change something fundamentally. For many, this is a major challenge to overcome. What do you think? We think it's time to change that! Open and shameless communication with your partner is the key to this, because you should discuss everything together in advance to determine where you stand as a couple and whether period sex could be an option or not better solo sex a viable solution could be. We would like to discuss the pros and cons in the following section.

Is period sex a no-go or even a pleasure booster?

The answer to this question is very individual, there is no right or wrong. It has been scientifically proven that orgasms and the sensation of sexual pleasure during your period can contribute to your feeling of well-being during your menstrual period. Seen from this point of view, period sex can be used as a pleasure booster. As you know from your own experience, however, there are days when you are not feeling well and you suffer from abdominal cramps and back pain, so the desire for rest and relaxation should of course be the priority. Don't fight it!

A study of Condom Use Research Team (kinseyinstitute.org) of the renowned American Kinsey Institute revealed:

"15 percent of those affected are accustomed to being sexually active during menstruation, while 48 percent avoid having sex during this menstrual phase. 41 percent of women prefer to focus on stimulating their partner."

If this also applies to you and sex during the period is not an option for you and your partner, then maybe solo sex with Sex Toys a beautiful and satisfying solution. When If you want to deal more intensively with your pleasure center, we can offer you ours Date Box Pussy Meditation von OH MY FANTASY! recommend that supports you in exploring, getting to know and caressing. IIn any case, you should deal with your menstrual cycle in order to better understand your own desire - and thus yourself - during this special phase.

Your libido and the four seasons of menstruation

We all know from personal experience that how we feel during the menstrual cycle varies greatly. To better understand these changes, we need to go a little further and explain what is involved in the menstrual cycle. The one available for free Workbook of the German digital education platform about menstruation, cycle health and sexuality Vulvani is very revealing and we would therefore like to bring the following information closer to you. Unfortunately, far too little thought is given to this topic, which is very important for all people with a vulva.

The average menstrual cycle, which lasts 25-34 days, includes various phases that go beyond the actual period and each mean very individual hormonal changes. The natural cycle can be aptly compared to the four seasons, each with its own peculiarities. The changes in energy, needs and forces in the rhythm of the cycle become plastically comprehensible through this subdivision into phases. These four cycle phases repeat themselves month after month and so do your associated feelings and mood swings.

Nevertheless, every person with a vulva experiences their own menstrual cycle in a very individual way. You know it all too well: sometimes you feel really weak and sluggish and other days you want to tear up trees and hug the whole world effusively. Similar to the outer seasons, there are times in the menstrual cycle when you feel most comfortable at home and secluded and others that are challenging. In still others you can hardly save yourself from zest for action and excess energy.

When is your pleasure peak in the cycle?

The beginning of a new cycle is the first day of the monthly bleeding. So the first phase is die Menstruation: a cozy, slow time at home. In this phase, draw strength from stillness, calm and reflection. The essential thing here is: rest and create opportunities for retreat so that you can recharge your batteries. Perhaps you can reschedule stressful appointments and travel, or work from home. The period costs your body a lot of strength, so use your energy sparingly during this challenging time. self care is particularly important now. Calm down, let go or plan things.

With the end of menstruation, the next phase begins, the so-called Follikelphase. With a rising estrogen level, it brings more energy, motivation, focus and self-confidence into your life. You feel light and free. Try new things, be curious. Get involved: plan and organize to your heart's content. 

If you then go to the next phase the ovulation come, even more energy and creativity is released as the hormone level continues to rise. Now you have an extremely high implementation power, use them actively, because the time of ovulation is your personal power phase. You feel happy, motivated and sexy. Invest now in personal relationships. This is the ideal time! This is also your fertile cycle phase and the probability of getting pregnant is high! 

This phase is replaced by die Lutealphase. Maybe you feel a little more sensitive during this time, would rather withdraw and think a lot. This phase can be exhausting and not always pleasant. But be understanding and compassionate with yourself, because self-criticism is inappropriate now. Many also associate this phase of the cycle with premenstrual syndrome, also known as PMS. Feelings of fear, sadness, or worry are now more pronounced. However, such complaints also disappear again as if by magic with the onset of menstruation. The menstrual cycle ends on the day before the next menstrual period begins.

The effect of hormonal birth control on your libido

Unfortunately, hormonal contraceptive methods not only suppress ovulation, but also the natural hormonal fluctuations that accompany it, which we have discussed in detail in the previous section. This often leads to your Libido is no longer really supported by your own body. You should be aware of this worrying fact. The primary goal of hormonal contraceptives is to prevent pregnancy. This is achieved by influencing the cycle hormonally. 

In this case, however, the negative side effect for you is that not only fertility and ovulation, but also the high level of desire that you have in a natural cycle is suppressed in this way. Pleasurable fluctuations are thus strongly leveled out and the libido is partly "asleep" because it is not positively supported by your own body. Hormonal birth control methods also affect the composition of the important cervical mucus, which is a supportive and helpful lubricant and therefore has an essential function. The side effect of the pill is that inhibition of lust, which is actually a paradox, since it was originally developed for people with vulvas who want to actively live their sexuality. Originally, hormonal contraception was only intended to make sex "safer". As an alternative, there are good natural contraceptive methods that can be individually adjusted.

Trends in contraception

Natural, individual contraceptive methods are enjoying increasing popularity. This is a very positive development. The pill and its side effects are critically questioned and people make a conscious decision. Your individual life situation will be addressed and this is of importance that should not be underestimated! Unfortunately, until a few years ago, the pill still had the status of a lifestyle product and signaled to young people "I'm sexually active", "I'm an adult". During this time, the fact that it is a drug was simply suppressed. 

If people with vulva and couples do decide to take the pill today, this has been discussed with the gynaecologist, friends and partner, considerations went ahead and they are very well aware of the side effects. However, the trend is clearly towards natural family planning, contraception through menstrual cycle monitoring and hormone-free contraception. In this way you will also learn a lot about yourself, your own emotionality and perception of pleasure.

Tips for natural family planning

There are many different methods for natural family planning, some of which are complementary and also interact. Below we list some efficient modern methods:

• Daily measurement of basal body temperature with a cycle thermometer.
• Observing the cervical mucus and your own sense of pleasure during the cycle.
• Measuring the fertile and infertile days.
• Learning special rules and tips and tricks.
• keeping a diary.

Incidentally, many of the methods listed are also suitable for health monitoring in general. 

In any case, we can assure you and this advice also comes from the specialists of the digital education platform Vulvani: it is more beautiful and freer to live in harmony with your own body than to constantly fight against it. Just try it! Be curious! And then decide! You can learn to use your menstrual cycle as your own personal superpower - for your well-being, your sexuality and your productivity. 

This article is based on the Instagram live with Britta from @vulvani_. Vulvani is the digital education platform for everything to do with menstruation, cycle health and sexuality. You can find out more about this at https://www.vulvani.com/category/periodenwissen